Saturday, May 12, 2007 8:55 PM

i tried to be more appreciative
i tried to control my emotions
i tried not to lose my patience
i tried my best to practice well
i tried my bestest for ths all alr
but no one's gng believe a single shyt i say.

i tried to be more appreciative, but i know i showed the total opposite
i know you two are like really nice enough to burn your first weekend after exams to come help me with my piano practises;
like where on earth can i get such a sweet boyfriend who comes by to find me almost every single time i say i want him with me that day? and stay with me to pract piano cause i said that with him here i wont get so frustrated playing that easily?
and where on earth can i get some nice friend to come guide and practice piano with me when he cld jolly well sleep and play piano at his place instead of waking up early and coming all the way to my place just cause i wanted him to?
but in the end what did they get? i got really tired frustrated emo and just upset and went up into my room.just lock myself in there and cried. ijust didnt feel like it. and its like yeahh sighhh sorries to boyfriend and jinhong.i know i've been really unreasonable giving you two attitude or smthng when you came over this morning+afternoon to help. please please dont take to heart okaye. i think im like guilty now.

sighh.
sometimes i cant help but with the word TRUST and faith EXIST.
cause right now it seems LOST.
im just upset when misunderstndings happen.and when you jump into conclusions. like yeah.
and i got upset because i really did try my best to practise for that mozart piece already since i very well know that hello monday's music midyear. and i really did tried to be patient and practise. i wasnt like i dontknow. but i know people dont believe i PRACTISED. why cause my playing just DONT SHOW IT. but the pointe is that i TRIED. i really did and i really put in the effort to. but you people dont seem to believe. im like really sick and tired of it already. sigh.
its like when you put in effort. it DONT SHOW. and people DONT BELIEVE. then its like ohwell.

sigh i dontknow.
dont feel like posting again
i think im like super emo this days. and then jsut now went ECP hav dinner. and after that went seaside there. was NICE cause its been ages since i last went there. and yeah. but i think walking along the shore makes me think alot; cause i just had lots of things running through my mind just now making me realise lots of other stuff.
i wanna go ECP AGAIN to pick seashells + enjoy seabreeze + i really want spend time there cause it kinda helps me feel better despite all that random thoughts.


<3